Mondo Beyondo

The beautiful Andrea has created/started a Mondo Beyondo....which is something I've decided to write when I feel ready for this...and if I want to...here it goes:

1. What do you want to acknowledge yourself for in regard to 2007?

(What did you create? What challenges did you face with courage and strength? What promises did you keep to yourself? What brave choices did you make? What are you proud of?)

I want to acknowledge myself for looking 2007 straight in the eye. I wrote my dreams down...and it happenend. We moved countries....I met new people, had to look for a new job after being self-employed for 5 years. I had to face my fear of insecurity and loving myself through the process of interviews...acknowledging that I know I have a speech problem and that is ok.

I created a 'home' for us away from home. I was a wife and friend to my husband when he was struggling and together we have 'survived' 2007.

I promised myself that I'm going to be true to myself. In 2007 I learned that I can sit with every single feeling...and I learned that it sometimes is in my power to pull down the blanket from that feeling and start living again. In 2007 I learned to just be. I allowed myself to just be.

To leave all I know behind, and move away from everything that I know I am, was one of the brave things I've done, but braver than that was to just let everything be...if friends don't phone or write...just let it be.


2. What is there to grieve about 2007?(What was disappointing? What was scary? What was hard? What can you forgive yourself for?)
I grieve my life which I left back home. I grieve every little aspect of that...I grieve our home, having to leave our dogs there, I grieve leaving my school, the children, my friends, I grieve my life as I knew it.

I also grieve friendships that died...where I have moved on. I grieve that although it is still sad for me.... people change and that is ok.

I forgive myself for all the tears I cried. I forgive myself for not being grateful every day for all that I have and experience. I forgive myself for choosing to 'live' with my losses and sadness.

I forgive myself for not living in the moment...and for choosing to experiencing the sadness knowing that there has been many positives.

I grieve that 2007 was yet another childless year.

3. What else do you need to say about the year to declare it complete?
I declare 2007 DONE! Complete! Over! Gone! Thank you and good bye! Yay!!!!

My focus for 2008: If i may quote Richard in Eat Pray Love.."you should put your wishbone where your backbone is..."(and my part) and start living! Exactly what I'm going to do!